I’ve Been Keeping a Secret….

A couple of weeks ago, I made an announcement on Facebook and Twitter about a very special secret I’ve been keeping. I hate secrets, quite honestly, and you don’t know how hard it’s been keeping quiet about a special “project” I’m working on. I finally feel comfortable enough to make an official announcement and I can’t wait to share the upcoming journey with you! So, without further ado….

I’m pregnant!

surrogate

Although I’m not new to pregnancy, I am new to being a surrogate. This is my first experience carrying a child for someone else and I’m sure the journey ahead will be quite different from the pregnancies before but my family and I welcome the differences and look forward to this experience.

At this time, the Intended Parents would like to remain anonymous (which I totally understand) but they have given me their blessing to chronicle the experience here on the blog and share it with you.

We are currently just in the eighth week and have seen the heartbeat via ultrasound twice already. Given that we only transferred one embryo, it was really no surprise that there is just one little baby in there (thank goodness). The Intended Parents had the final say in the transfer and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t terrified at just the thought of the possibility of carrying multiples.

This isn’t a journey that my husband and I decided to take on a whim. In fact, it’s been something we’ve been talking about for close to seven years. We knew we wanted to help, but we also wanted to make sure our family was complete first. After the arrival of our youngest four years ago, we knew we were complete. We then started researching surrogacy with a little more tenacity and here we are, much later than we originally planned, taking the journey that was meant for us. We couldn’t be more excited and thankful for this opportunity.

I understand that you may not agree with our decision, but all I ask is that you respect our decision and keep comments uplifting and encouraging. All other comments will be deleted.


About Crystal

Crystal is Owner & Editor of Simply Being Mommy. She is a work-at-home mom and enjoys being wife and mommy. She loves family, travel, chocolate and Diet Coke.

Comments

  1. 1

    Congratulations! That’s awesome.

  2. 3

    Surrogacy is such a selfless, amazing thing and I look forward to following your journey!

  3. 5

    This is so awesome Crystal! I have always always wanted to do this because of the wonderful gift you can give someone. Unfortunately because I’ve had three c-sections I don’t believe I’m the best candidate.

    Congrats to you and your family for the decision and gift. And Congrats to the new family you are helping create.

  4. 7

    I think what you guys are doing is amazing. I have thought about it so may be something we do in the future. I can’t wait to follow along the journey!

  5. 9

    People have issues with surrogacy? I had no idea. Congrats to the intended parents and sending love to you and yours on this journey. (((HUGS)))

    • 10

      You’d be surprised, Connie. But thanks so much!

    • 11

      People have issues with everything unfortunately! :( My hubby and I are in the process of adoption and you wouldn’t believe some of the crazy mean things people say!

      I think it’s such a blessing to carry a child for someone else whether through surrogacy or adoption. Glad you want to keep things positive, Crystal…I’ll definitely be following along! :)

      I’d be interested to know (if you want to share sometime) if you will remain a part of this family’s life as the child grows? I didn’t know how that worked in surrogacy situations so was just curious :)

      • 12

        I’m so sorry to hear some people aren’t supportive of your decision to adopt, Jenn! I think it’s absolutely awesome and commend you for giving a child a family that will love and cherish them.

        As far as staying a part of my surro-baby’s life, I’d like to but I’m leaving it up to the parents. I don’t want to intrude, I just want like little updates, ya know. We will see how that all works out.

  6. 13

    This is so amazing, such a wonderful thing to do for someone!! Congrats, I look forward to reading about your journey.

  7. 15

    It’s a wonderul thing – congrats!

  8. 17

    Crystal, what an amazing and self-less thing you guys are doing for this family. I have on friend who has been a surrogate 3 times and she simply blows my mind! I know this is going to be a wonderful experience on so many different levels. What a blessing!

    • 18

      Wow, three times huh? I guess we will see how this one goes before I start thinking about another one LOL! I’m just so excited to be a part of this whole experience.

  9. 19

    It’s very kind of you! I have questions about this (I hope you don’t mind). If they IP wanted to transfer more than one, but you weren’t willing to carry more than one child, what would happen? Would you have to change who you carried for, and they find another surrogate? Or do you sign up and give up the right to decide that?

    • 20

      I was willing to allow them to transfer up to two embryos, it was part of our contract. This is all decided before medications even begin. Some surrogates allow more, but I just wasn’t comfortable with the thought of possibly carrying more than two. The IP’s I’m working with were great about the whole thing and when it came down to it, only transferred one. To be honest, if I were them, I would have probably transferred two just to up my chances.

  10. 21

    What great news! Congrats to you and the intended parents! And kudos to you for doing something so beautiful and selfless for another couple!

  11. 23

    Congratulations! Nothing is more precious than the gift of parenthood and it’s wonderful you’re able to provide that for a special couple. Excited to watch your journey unfold.

  12. 25
    Linda Kish says:

    Congratulations to you all

  13. 27
    Nicole M says:

    Good for you! That is such a wonderful thing for you to do!

  14. 29

    Such an awesome experience and gift! Kudos!

  15. 31
    Kristin S. says:

    Congrats! SUch a wonderful thing you are doing:)

  16. 33

    Better you than me!

  17. 34
    Leslie G says:

    I can not think of one negative thing about some one giving the joy of a child to another. I am so glad that their are people in this world able to give other mothers this gift. Congradulations.

  18. 36

    Wow. Such a selfless act this is. It’s not easy being pregnant with your own biological baby…and now this? Amazing.

  19. 38

    Congrats!!!

  20. 40
    Melissa says:

    Congratulations! I am so happy for you!

  21. 42

    Congratulations to you and the expecting parents. I wish you much good health during your pregnancy. When is the baby due? I bet everyone that does know must be very proud of you :)

  22. 44

    Congratulations! What an amazing gift!

  23. 46

    That’s so generous and selfless of you to give such a wonderful gift to another couple! Congratulations, Crystal!

  24. 48

    Crystal….you are an amazing woman and I am super excited to watch and read your blogs, through out this journey. God will bless you for the wonderful gift and I know the couple will be forever grateful. Best wishes to you and yours………..Congrats!

  25. 52

    Such a beautiful gift to give another family! I have had multiple c-sections and I can’t say pregnancy was fun for me, so I have a lot of respect for what you are taking on. I hope you have an amazing pregnancy experience.

  26. 54

    I cannot imagine a greater gift any woman could do for someone. I’m not sure it qualifies for sainthood but my goodness it would have to be right up there.

    Congratulations to you all and I hope it’s just the breeziest experience for you. The new parents must be over the moon with excitement. I’m pretty excited and I just read about it.

    • 55

      Thank you so much, Maureen. We are all pretty excited and just ready for whatever the next part of this journey brings us through.

  27. 56

    looking forward to following along on your journey

  28. 58

    Such an amazing journey!! I am so excited for you and your surrogate family.

  29. 60

    You’re an amazing person. It’s not easy, and I applaud you and am so PROUD of you for doing this.

  30. 62

    Congratulations! I look forward to reading more about your surrogacy journey.

  31. 64

    You are amazing to do this! Congratulations!!!

  32. 66

    I think it’s wonderful, and I’m so happy for you!

  33. 68

    How exciting! With my own on the way and making me hot, tired, and hurting I commend you. ;)

  34. 70

    Congrats to all of you! It’s an amazing thing that you’re doing and I wish you an easy pregnancy!

  35. 72

    Congratulations, Crystal! I’m so glad you started following me on Twitter…because I came to see who you were before following you…and I’m thrilled to be part of your new journey. Of course everyone is entitled to their own opinions…but it sounds like you have a wonderful attitude and have thought this through with your family. Perhaps this quote from, of all people, Dr. Seuss: “Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.”
    I’ll be following you back…and also following your blog to share in this incredible experience. :)

  36. 74

    It is amazing what you are doing. I am so excited to be able to follow your journey from the beginning.

  37. 76

    Congratualations!

  38. 78

    You know how I feel about this – I am so happy that you are doing this for a couple who wants a baby.
    You are such a wonderful family for doing this.
    You have proven once again that you and Ryan are two of the sweetest, most loving people I have ever met.
    I cannot wait to take this journey with you. God bless you both.

  39. 80

    I’m so excited for you…I will be following!

  40. 82

    Wow! Congratulations! What a wonderful gift to give a family!

  41. 84

    I think it’s an amazing thing that you are doing and it takes someone very special to be a surrogate!

  42. 86

    congrats to all of you. This is an amazing gift you are giving to the IPs. Can’t wait to hear about this journey

  43. 88

    You are doing such a beautiful thing. God bless and can’t wait to hear more about your journey! :)

  44. 90

    How wonderful for you and your IPs. I’m excited to read all about your progress. I wish you and the little one the best health.

  45. 92

    I don’t think I can tell you enough how amazingly AWESOME you are! Looking forward to continuing to follow the journey. Praying for health and wellness through the entire pregnancy. <3

  46. 94

    What an amazing thing to do for another family. Congratulations to everyone and may you have an uneventful pregnancy.

  47. 96
    Bianca Roman says:

    Congratulations, darling!

  48. 97

    You are a wonderful person Crystal! I’ve too thought of being a surrogate and maybe one day I will be. :)

    • 98

      Thanks, Alison. I figured if my body was still capable of making a baby, why not help a couple who couldn’t. After several interviews I thought I’d never find the couple I wanted to help, but finally did! It’s been an exciting journey thus far.

      How are you feeling?

  49. 99

    Congratulations my friend! <3

  50. 101

    Congrats, Crystal! What a beautiful gift you are giving that family.

  51. 103

    Very happy for you guys and your decision! You are blessing a family with a wonderful gift for sure!!

  52. 105

    You have my utmost respect! What a selfless & loving thing you & your family are doing. Much love & prayers during your pregnancy!

  53. 106

    Congratulations to you and your family! You are a blessing to the family you are creating.

  54. 108

    I did see the news on FB but happy to say anyway what a wonderful, selfless thing you’re doing. Good for you! Wish the world had more giving people like you. Hope the pregnancy goes smoothly!

  55. 110
    Peggy Deloge says:

    Congrats to all!! A new life is a wonderful thing! Especially when you can give so much of yourself for someone else! My cousins twins were born to them this way. All are very very happy!! Thank you!!

    • 111

      Awww, thanks Peggy. I love hearing other stories about surrogacy. I just wish all states recognized it and made it easier for couples struggling with infertility.

  56. 112

    You finally came out!! LOL I will be following your journey :)

  57. 114
    Beth campbell says:

    Who in their right minds would ever disagree with what you’re doing here! You are giving a child to a couple who desperately want one and are doing all they can to have one. There are soo many couples out there that would make such wonderful parents, and for some reason, they cannot have a child of their own. I think what you are doing is the most selfless act of love that I’ve ever seen! It’s not going to be easy, but nothing worth while is ever easy. I applaud you and your family! What an awesome gift you are giving. I wish that I could do that, I wish I could be as comfortable as you seem to be to volunteer my body for a childish couple who really want a child. God bless you and keep you and this baby safe

  58. 116

    Congrats to you and the people you are doing this for! Such a wonderful thing you are doing mama!!!!!!

  59. 118

    I can’t believe that anyone would even have something negative to say – I think that what you’re doing is amazing!

  60. 120

    So happy for you! Having just completed my first surrogacy journey, I know how amazing of an experience is ahead of you!

  61. 122

    How wonderful. I’m not handling pregnancy well – I’m miserable! – so I really commend you for doing this!

  62. 124

    I think this is an amazing thing you are doing. I have always wanted to be a surrogate for someone. Like you I want to make sure we are finished first so until I know beyond a shadow of a doubt we won’t look too deep into it but once I know and if I am the right age I would love to do this. It’s such a wonderful gift.

  63. 126

    This is such an amazing thing you’re doing! My best friend was diagnosed with breast cancer last year and thankfully, as of a few months ago, she’s cancer free! One of the down sides to this was that her dr told her that she wouldn’t be able to carry the 3 embryos they froze before she started treatment. She actually just asked me the other day if I would consider being a surrogate for her. I had my first child last March and, since she’s practicaly been my sister since we were 5, I wanted to do it for her. But, my husband convinced me to wait until our family was complete, after one more child, before I jumped into this pool. I agreed, and since she wasn’t looking to do this right away, hopefully I can do this for her in a few years or so. I’m eager to read how you progress through this journey! Just wondering though, are the IP’s people that you know? Thanks again, and I’m so glad I came across your page while looking for a healthy banana bread recipe! LOL

    • 127

      Hi Aimee, I’m so sorry to hear about your friend, well not sorry that the cancer is gone but sorry that she can no longer carry her embryos. I think it’s amazing that you are even considering carrying for her. I can say that this has been one of the most humbling experiences of my life. As sick as I am (dreaded morning sickness or all day in my case) I don’t regret this for one second. Although I am not the one who ultimately gives life, I’m helping create this little life inside of me that I get to hand over to his/her parents when it’s time. Gosh, I’m not sure there is anything I’ve done in life that has so much meaning. I’ve had my own children, of course, and each of those pregnancies were incredibly beautiful and meaningful, but to be able to give someone a child, to me, it’s just incredible.

  64. 128

    I’m sure it takes courage to do this. Congrats and I pray your pregnancy is healthy and full of memories.

  65. 130

    Awwwww, congrats!

  66. 132

    I’m so glad this is finally happening for both you and the family. =)

  67. 134

    Congrats! What an incredible gift! Immeasurable!

  68. 136

    This is so amazing! I understand the struggles of getting pregnant and even though we did not have to go down this rought knowing that this option is still feasible warms my heart!!

  69. 138

    I am so excited for you and this journey!! What an amazing gift you are giving this family!

  70. 140

    While I am too old to carry I did consider it at one time. (my youngest is 12 and I had her at age 39). I have several family members unable to have children and have seen the pain of this. I am so undeniably blessed with 6 children and can’t imagine my life without them. For a family to pursue this on EITHER end is a unique and personal and completely amazing and wonder-filled journey! It is extremely selfless for a woman…a couple…a family to do for another family (lets’ face it, pregnancy is NOT easy on a family, including a spouse/partner and other family members…so in essence, the whole FAMILY is giving that other family a chance at a family life with giggles and love in their home that might otherwise be silent and somewhat empty). Take a bow guys, you will be rewarded in so many ways for your big hearts. For those who scoff, they might want to read some success stories of this kind of love. When the legalities are taken out of the picture and all accounted for, this is nothing short of a compassionate miracle! And all babies are miracles, no matter how they come to this world:)

  71. 142

    I’m late to the party but just wanted to echo my congratulations once again! Who on earth would leave a negative comment?? I’m sad that you had to put that warning in your post, that blows my mind!

    Simply amazed at you and your family. YOU are amazing. xo.

  72. 144
    Charlotte V. says:

    I couldn’t even begin to imagine the difference and how you feel. I mean I guess you would feel different. Do you feel really attached or just know that you shouldn’t get attached? I think it’s AWESOME that there’s surrogate mothers out there. You all are so strong and it’s such a beautiful thing that you and your husband are doing. I’m sure this couple is so thankful for you. This is something I would be interested in but I’m scared I would get too attached in the process and hurt everyone. That’s why I say your so STRONG! Thanks for sharing and can’t wait to hear the updates!

  73. 145

    Looking forward to reading more about your experience.

  74. 146

    this is amazing Crystal! I’n not sure how I missed this announcmeent, but I am guessing since I was busy moving and taking care of a newborn…

    what you are doing is amazing, so many fmailies can’t have babies on their own. we struggled with secondary infertility and I know how heartbreaking it is.

    you rock mama!

  75. 147

    What A Beautiful Thing To Do….Absolutely Amazing! God Bless You! :)

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