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New Year, New Routines and New Worries

Well, 2013 is in full swing and this mama is having a hard time with the new year.  I’ve had a month to come to terms with the changes 2013 would bring, but it doesn’t seem like the month was nearly long enough.  I just want to go back.  Go back to where I was comfortable and before I knew what 2013 would bring…

I know it’s probably not a big deal to some, but it’s the first time in over nine years that I’ve been without any of my children at home during the day.  I miss them.  More than I thought was possible.  But now that my youngest is in Pre-K, I feel lost.  I’m home…alone.  I should be rejoicing, jumping up and down on the bed, getting the house in order.  But all I do is watch the clock, as it slowly ticks away.

peyton first day of school prek

Yesterday was Peyton’s first day of Pre-K.  There was finally an opening and I knew that I wanted to prepare him for Kindergarten but I had no idea how it would affect me or him.  Well, that’s not entirely true.  I had my doubts that it would be easy peasy, but I had no idea it would be this hard.

I fully expected a melt down from Peyton yesterday during drop off, but much to my surprise, he did so well.  No tears at all, from Peyton at least.  But today, there were tears.  I just wanted to scoop him up in my arms and bring him back home.  He said that he had a “great” time when I asked him how is day was yesterday so I really don’t understand why he was so upset today.

I’ve heard it gets better and I’m counting on that holding true.  I can’t stand the thought of having to walk away from my crying child three days each week. I just can’t do it.  I was the parent this morning in the hall weeping.  I didn’t dare let Peyton see me cry, but I couldn’t make it all the way out to the car before breaking down.

Gosh, tell me it gets easier y’all.  I don’t know if I can continue to send him if my mornings are going to go like this.  I thought I was doing the right thing by sending him, but now I’m not so sure.

About Crystal

Crystal Reagan, the owner and founder of SimplyBeingMommy.com lives in Small Town, Texas with her husband and 3 children. Crystal and her website have been featured on local and national news stations including Channel 2 Houston and ABC News. She has also appeared on BetterTV as a Mommy Expert for VTech.


  1. 1

    It does get easier! They rarely cry long… just enough to make us feel bad. It may take a week (or two)for him to stop crying but he will. And if he said he really enjoyed his day yesterday I am sure he had a great time. I am not looking forward to the empty house. Monkey is 3 but by the time she is ready to go to school I think the girls will want to begin homeschooling. 🙂

  2. 3

    Without a doubt he will adjust and it will be fine! Like Staci said, they really aren’t crying too much beyond drop time but it’s your last glimpse of that tear-stained face that you remember. By the end of this month, he’ll be adjusted. Hugs!

  3. 5

    It gets easier!! All of my kids started school this past August and left me alone for most of the day. It was awkward at first, but here I am almost five months later enjoying my “me time”, I go to the gym and stay on top of my blog more.

  4. 7

    Oh poor mommy. You know, I actually had the opposite problem on K’s first day of preschool. I expected my shy and nervous girl to cry, but she never looked back. That caused me buckets of tears! It will get better!

  5. 9

    It does get easier, each day it will get a little easier! Next week he will probably be excited to go! 🙂

  6. 11
    Debrah Reid says:

    Oh Crystal 🙁 It really does get easier (for him). He might have been picking up on your energy and just had a hard time of it. I am sure he did great today and will continue to do so.

    It will get easier for you as well. It will be a time that maybe you can start a new hobby or project. It’s a nerve racking yet exciting time in your lives. I hope you can embrace it soon!

  7. 13

    As soon as you walked away, I can almost guarantee he stopped crying. And you may have an occasional day that he will cry. It’s just part of growing up.

  8. 15
    Karen Medlin says:

    It does get easier, hang in there.

  9. 17

    I agree with the others, it gets easier and make sure you tell the teacher(s) outside of earshot from your son that if it continues once you leave to please let you know, but I bet he is indeed fine when you leave.

    Hugs mama, it’s hard to let go. (( ))

  10. 19

    It does get better, he just misses Mommy which means you are doing a great job. Just know that you have so many that TOTALLY understand how you feel. Hugs girl!

  11. 21

    Pre-k was hard. When full day kindergarten stared and she started taking the bus home, that really stressed me out.

  12. 23

    Oh gosh.. I hate the idea of sending my baby off to school! 🙁 I know it gets easier.. just the initial that hurt so!

  13. 25

    It absolutely gets easier for them. He will make friends and love going to school. However, for me it never has gotten better. My son is in the 4th grade, and I would much rather have him here. I do plan on homeschooling or a co-op through middle school, though. 🙂

  14. 27

    trust me he will love it after a week and you’ll see how happy it makes him!

  15. 29

    I am going to have to go through that next year. Sigh.

  16. 30

    Oh I hate when our schedules change. It was a whole new ballgame when Joshua went off to middle school this year and his school is an hour drive from the house round trip twice a day, plus homeschooling Jordan. It does get easier though and you will have it under control in no time.

  17. 31

    my preschooler has been going since the beginning of the year I hadn’t realized how much he needed it. He did really great the first half of the year but since Christmas break he begs me not to take him. He says he needs a mommy day and doesn’t care about his friends. I think he’s having anxiety issues.

    the point I’m trying to make is that kids adjust and then they reevaluate and need to adjust again. I used to bring something special every day I picked him up from school. He looked forward to the surprises. Maybe you can do something like that with your son

  18. 32

    For my oldest it was easy right from the start so I’m no help :/ She loved going to school and I honestly love the time to myself.

  19. 33

    It does get easier! Zoe had her crying days, and still does. But for the most part she loves school and learning and hanging out with friends. It will get better for you too mama! Hang in there.

  20. 34

    Oh mama, I don’t know how I’m going to deal with my son starting school. Thanks for sharing this.

  21. 35

    Griffin had a hard time last year and it took him awhile to adjust, but once he did…he made some friends and had some great experiences. I hope Peyton adjusts quickly.

  22. 36

    *hugs* It’ll get easier mama.

  23. 37

    I hope it gets easier for you. My dude starts preschool in August & I’m already nervous. I want to think that I’ll enjoy the free time, but I already miss him & he hasn’t even started yet!

  24. 38

    What a cutie! We all know we need to give our children roots and wings, but no one said how hard it would be. XO

  25. 39

    It will get easier for both of you. he will love the memories he makes at school and you will love the routine you will get during school hours 🙂 Hugs mama.

  26. 40

    It does get better! My daughter asks to go to school now!

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